And once again I have let another month slip by without blogging/addressing my goals. Maybe I will share this on my twitter to encourage myself to post more. Even if I'm not keeping track of my goals in a spread sheet (which I said I was going to do), I will at least be blogging more often, and therefore become more mindful of these attempts at positive change. Maybe?
July was supposed to be a month of being "alone but not lonely". That didn't really happen as a few changes at school have caused me to have double the amount of work I had anticipated for the month. Between my full time job, part time job, school, and volunteering commitments, I have found it difficult to have time to myself (without feeling guilty about it).
Blah blah blah. Complain complain. Moving on.
August Goal - Being Thankful
I am actually the WORST at being thankful. Always complaining. It's bad.
I will start this goal by making a list of things I have to be thankful for:
- Family
- Friends
- Health
- Education and work opportunities
- Security (by this I mean my house, food, I don't really have to worry about money, etc.)
- Living in Canada
... these are pretty generic things to be thankful for but I can't write a post about being thankful for the things in my life without mentioning them. August will be a month to focus in on both being thankful (or rather being more mindful of being thankful ... on this note I feel like I should write a post about mindfulness) and on showing my gratitude. I imagine that this can only have positive influences on my personal relationships, thus increasing happiness? Yes?
I am now semi unemployed so I will use this week to ACTUALLY MAKE A GOAL SPREAD SHEET. I mean who needs to do their school work ... cough cough.
I suck at this.
Tuesday, 5 August 2014
Wednesday, 2 July 2014
Another month!
Comments on my June goal:
The goal of showing more affection got me thinking about who(m) I hold affection for. There is the obvious and generalized answer of "my friends and family", but I started thinking about specific members of those groups and which people are the most positive influences in my life. Who are the most supportive, forgiving, genuine people. I am in no way saying that I am the perfect friend, sister, or daughter, because I'm not. I'm moody and quick tempered. I'm quick to judge and can sometimes get too wrapped up in my own drama to care about anyone else's. That being said, I have come to a point in my life where I no longer want to be spending time on things or people that are not going to create positive changes in my life. If I am surrounded by positivity, it will probably make me more positive. (Another downfall, I am kind of negative). I feel selfish for thinking this way, but I know I have been needing a change for a long time now and this may be part of it. I don't know how to summarize my thoughts on this goal/concept. Ugh.
(Side note: I am having a really hard time addressing this topic. I keep writing and deleting seconds after. I don't know how to talk about different people in my life who may or may not be positive influences and how I am feeling about addressing this situation. Am I being pretentious? Maybe I'll come back to this later.)
Overall, showing affection seemed to encourage more positive interactions which I think made me happier. Moderate success with this goal.
July Goal - Being alone (but not lonely)
I am rarely alone. Between work, school, and living with/going out with friends/family, I am normally surrounded by a group of people. I used to enjoy this, but it has gotten to a point of making me exhausted/mentally drained. Although I have been feeling better lately, I was almost dreading social engagements over the spring season because I felt like they were taking too much out of me and weren't enjoyable. Because I have very little alone time, time spent with other people can sometimes feel like a chore. I am not trying to insult anyone I spend time with in saying that, but being "on" all the time can be tiring. I have recognized that I need time to decompress and feel comfortable with being by myself (because whether or not I want to admit it, part of being surrounded by others all the time probably has something to with my insecurity of being alone).
I am starting this goal on the second of the month (not bad) so hopefully it can be addressed everyday by giving myself alone time. I am also planning to go out less ie. less partying (however that is moreso of a health goal than a happiness goal as I am also training to jog a 16 km road race at the end of July).
Let's see how this works out.
The goal of showing more affection got me thinking about who(m) I hold affection for. There is the obvious and generalized answer of "my friends and family", but I started thinking about specific members of those groups and which people are the most positive influences in my life. Who are the most supportive, forgiving, genuine people. I am in no way saying that I am the perfect friend, sister, or daughter, because I'm not. I'm moody and quick tempered. I'm quick to judge and can sometimes get too wrapped up in my own drama to care about anyone else's. That being said, I have come to a point in my life where I no longer want to be spending time on things or people that are not going to create positive changes in my life. If I am surrounded by positivity, it will probably make me more positive. (Another downfall, I am kind of negative). I feel selfish for thinking this way, but I know I have been needing a change for a long time now and this may be part of it. I don't know how to summarize my thoughts on this goal/concept. Ugh.
(Side note: I am having a really hard time addressing this topic. I keep writing and deleting seconds after. I don't know how to talk about different people in my life who may or may not be positive influences and how I am feeling about addressing this situation. Am I being pretentious? Maybe I'll come back to this later.)
Overall, showing affection seemed to encourage more positive interactions which I think made me happier. Moderate success with this goal.
July Goal - Being alone (but not lonely)
I am rarely alone. Between work, school, and living with/going out with friends/family, I am normally surrounded by a group of people. I used to enjoy this, but it has gotten to a point of making me exhausted/mentally drained. Although I have been feeling better lately, I was almost dreading social engagements over the spring season because I felt like they were taking too much out of me and weren't enjoyable. Because I have very little alone time, time spent with other people can sometimes feel like a chore. I am not trying to insult anyone I spend time with in saying that, but being "on" all the time can be tiring. I have recognized that I need time to decompress and feel comfortable with being by myself (because whether or not I want to admit it, part of being surrounded by others all the time probably has something to with my insecurity of being alone).
I am starting this goal on the second of the month (not bad) so hopefully it can be addressed everyday by giving myself alone time. I am also planning to go out less ie. less partying (however that is moreso of a health goal than a happiness goal as I am also training to jog a 16 km road race at the end of July).
Let's see how this works out.
Thursday, 19 June 2014
Showing Affection
Showing affection can sometimes be a very difficult thing for me and I'm not sure why. My parents have always been affectionate, my family is generally open and loving, and the majority of my friends appear to be quite comfortable with this concept. When I think about it, it's kind of strange that I, a person who has been in multiple long term relationships and holds a fairly solid group of friends/family, have a hard time feeling comfortable with showing affection. I generally associate affection-showing with awkwardness, or too much contact with people (Weird? Maybe I have a guard up? Anyways).
The only reason I can come up with for this discomfort with the expression of affection is the vulnerability that I perceive to be attached to this concept. But does showing affection actually make someone vulnerable? Maybe yes, in the sense that they are openly expressing their emotions, but maybe no. Maybe the ability to express affection demonstrates a certain confidence in feeling comfortable with both yourself and your emotions? Comfortable enough to express them without fear of judgement from your peers? Anyways I digress ...
How might affection be related to my happiness? I'm not 100% sure, but I'm predicting that an increased comfort level in showing affection will positively enhance the relationships around me, which may in turn enhance my (perceived) levels of happiness? (Now I sound like I'm writing another thesis ... ugh). I am definitely turning into that annoying psychology student friend who tries to turn everything into a psychological discussion. But moving on (goal breakdown as I am writing this on my lunch break and don't have much time left).
3 ways to hopefully improve my comfort levels with showing affection:
1) Hug at least one person a day (without crossing boundaries and/or being creepy, obviously)
2) If I'm feeling positive/happy while hanging out with someone, I will (try to) tell them
3) Try to commit 1 act of gratitude for someone in my life at least 3 times a week
I KNOW I KNOW there are only 2 weeks left to June. But I've been busy. Working 1 full time job, 1 part time job, being in school full time, collecting data, volunteering, and trying to still have a social life has taken over my summer. I'm trying y'all (even though no one is reading this anyways so it doesn't matter...).
Susan
The only reason I can come up with for this discomfort with the expression of affection is the vulnerability that I perceive to be attached to this concept. But does showing affection actually make someone vulnerable? Maybe yes, in the sense that they are openly expressing their emotions, but maybe no. Maybe the ability to express affection demonstrates a certain confidence in feeling comfortable with both yourself and your emotions? Comfortable enough to express them without fear of judgement from your peers? Anyways I digress ...
How might affection be related to my happiness? I'm not 100% sure, but I'm predicting that an increased comfort level in showing affection will positively enhance the relationships around me, which may in turn enhance my (perceived) levels of happiness? (Now I sound like I'm writing another thesis ... ugh). I am definitely turning into that annoying psychology student friend who tries to turn everything into a psychological discussion. But moving on (goal breakdown as I am writing this on my lunch break and don't have much time left).
3 ways to hopefully improve my comfort levels with showing affection:
1) Hug at least one person a day (without crossing boundaries and/or being creepy, obviously)
2) If I'm feeling positive/happy while hanging out with someone, I will (try to) tell them
3) Try to commit 1 act of gratitude for someone in my life at least 3 times a week
I KNOW I KNOW there are only 2 weeks left to June. But I've been busy. Working 1 full time job, 1 part time job, being in school full time, collecting data, volunteering, and trying to still have a social life has taken over my summer. I'm trying y'all (even though no one is reading this anyways so it doesn't matter...).
Susan
Monday, 16 June 2014
Falling off (and getting back on) the bandwagon?
Apparently, I suck at blogging. The last time I attempted to post anything was about two months ago. This is what I wrote.
"I actually hate the saying "hopping on the bandwagon" or anything else to do with a bandwagon, but I felt like it was an appropriate title for this post as I have fallen behind on my happiness project. I was very motivated to complete this project at the beginning, and still am wanting to finish it, however it's hard to keep on top of this between school, working, volunteering, and trying to find time to hang out with friends/family during the week. I don't even think I've been to the gym in three weeks (terrible - I know). We are already halfway into April and I'm only now looking at my April goals, but better late that never?
My goals for April are related to taking risks. I chose to work on this goal for a couple of reasons, the main one being that I am a pretty cautious and regulated person in my day to day life. I have certain routines that I like to follow through with, I don't like to extend far beyond these normal/routine activities, and I am pretty dependent on these routines/the people within them. Although there is nothing wrong with having a routine (and I think that we, as humans, are more productive when we have some semblance of a routine in our lives), I feel that this reliance on the everyday has hindered my ability to take risks and look outside the little world I've created for myself.
Unlike March, I am not going to break down the goal of taking risks because a) I don't have as much time left in this month and b) I feel that my upcoming trip is going to fully encompass the meaning of this goal or rather what I want to improve in myself.
As I mentioned in my previous post and in less than two weeks, I will be flying to France to see my friend Janet and from there we will be going to England and Greece."
... two months later, I will try to finish this post.
I went to Europe with Janet and had a great trip. Although I hated the hostels and was quite anxiety ridden throughout my travels, it was certainly a lesson in getting out on my own and handling things for myself. In a weird sense, I almost preferred travelling alone because the only person you need to worry about is yourself. Yes, I was with Janet most of the time, but flying from Canada to Europe by myself was quite intimidating. While I could talk about my trip to Europe for hours, I'll summarize but saying that while the Ativan helped, I feel like the trip helped me realize that I am okay on my own. I "took a risk", and felt good about it. Has this improved my overall happiness? I'm not sure.
My goal for June is to show affection. I am actually terrible at this. I am not one for lots of hugs or telling others how much I appreciate/like/love them. I'm currently looking out a window over the harbour of my city and wondering how on earth I can address this goal (which I am late starting, AGAIN).
I'll get back to this tomorrow. At least I'm back to blogging?
Susan
"I actually hate the saying "hopping on the bandwagon" or anything else to do with a bandwagon, but I felt like it was an appropriate title for this post as I have fallen behind on my happiness project. I was very motivated to complete this project at the beginning, and still am wanting to finish it, however it's hard to keep on top of this between school, working, volunteering, and trying to find time to hang out with friends/family during the week. I don't even think I've been to the gym in three weeks (terrible - I know). We are already halfway into April and I'm only now looking at my April goals, but better late that never?
My goals for April are related to taking risks. I chose to work on this goal for a couple of reasons, the main one being that I am a pretty cautious and regulated person in my day to day life. I have certain routines that I like to follow through with, I don't like to extend far beyond these normal/routine activities, and I am pretty dependent on these routines/the people within them. Although there is nothing wrong with having a routine (and I think that we, as humans, are more productive when we have some semblance of a routine in our lives), I feel that this reliance on the everyday has hindered my ability to take risks and look outside the little world I've created for myself.
Unlike March, I am not going to break down the goal of taking risks because a) I don't have as much time left in this month and b) I feel that my upcoming trip is going to fully encompass the meaning of this goal or rather what I want to improve in myself.
As I mentioned in my previous post and in less than two weeks, I will be flying to France to see my friend Janet and from there we will be going to England and Greece."
... two months later, I will try to finish this post.
I went to Europe with Janet and had a great trip. Although I hated the hostels and was quite anxiety ridden throughout my travels, it was certainly a lesson in getting out on my own and handling things for myself. In a weird sense, I almost preferred travelling alone because the only person you need to worry about is yourself. Yes, I was with Janet most of the time, but flying from Canada to Europe by myself was quite intimidating. While I could talk about my trip to Europe for hours, I'll summarize but saying that while the Ativan helped, I feel like the trip helped me realize that I am okay on my own. I "took a risk", and felt good about it. Has this improved my overall happiness? I'm not sure.
My goal for June is to show affection. I am actually terrible at this. I am not one for lots of hugs or telling others how much I appreciate/like/love them. I'm currently looking out a window over the harbour of my city and wondering how on earth I can address this goal (which I am late starting, AGAIN).
I'll get back to this tomorrow. At least I'm back to blogging?
Susan
Thursday, 27 March 2014
Countdown
Hi to anyone who is reading this! (which is probably no one ... haha).
This week I have been trying so hard to be productive and it is going half okay and half terrible. I'll be productive for 2 hours, and then watch tv or shop online for 3 hours. At the end of this week I'm supposed to have my intro/methods of my thesis completed, a discussion and future directions section of a manuscript drafted up, a final project for a counseling course, and have started studying for my stats final in 10 days. Yet here I am, blogging ...
How is this related to my happiness project? I guess I feel like the end result of getting all this work done will make me feel happy and accomplished, but the actual working part is not very enjoyable so I keep putting it off ... maybe "no more procrastinating" will be a goal for another month down the road.
My current goals for March are going well, although I'm having a hard time putting aside 10-15 minutes to be alone and disconnected each day. Like a lot of people I know, I am basically attached to my phone. I'm usually texting 2-3 people at a time, checking my e-mails, facebook, twitter, etc etc. It doesn't really match up with "remaining calm" if you have a million notifications coming in each day. Right now I'm sitting in a Starbucks with my macbook and iphone on my lap, both of which are showing texting/email notifications, so I'm getting the same messages from both devices. When you think about it, it's a bit much. But I digress ...
I don't believe I've mentioned that I'm going to Europe in April (27 days!) One of my very best friends is over there for school, so I felt that this was the perfect opportunity to finally visit Europe! I'll be flying into Paris, then London, then Athens, and then back to Paris. This might not be a big deal for a lot of people but I have a) never been to Europe before and b) have never travelled alone for such a long distance. Not surprisingly, I have a lot of anxiety about flying so I think this will be a great learning experience and will allow me to test my limits/hopefully prove to myself that I am less of a chicken than I think I am.
Regardless of any positive thinking, I will definitely be getting some Ativan for this trip ...
I should probably actually write my thesis now.
Susan
Tuesday, 18 March 2014
Rigidity of Thinking
I've been thinking a lot about my thought processes lately and wanted to get it all out in a blog post. This is not directly related to my goals for this month (which are coming and going in terms of my adherence to them), but I wanted to hash this out on "paper".
The most important thing I've learned over the past few months has been how my way of thinking has affected my perception of things around me, and my overall happiness/satisfaction. Specifically, the rigidity of my thoughts has greatly influenced my personal satisfaction with where my life is, and where it is going.
As my personality is somewhat rigid and tense, I have the tendency to think in black and white. I am either fully pleased or fully unhappy in the sense that it is easy for me to let a small unhappiness seep it's way into positive occurrences and dull their happy effects. Rigid thinking has also set me up for failure and disappointment, which has not contributed any happy feelings to my life. At the age of 24, I can say that I am not where I thought I would be by now, and I used to feel terrible about it. But I am not going to let myself feel bad about it anymore.
The most recent example of this type of thinking negatively impacting my happiness is the "life plan" I had drawn up for myself. Masters degree completed by age 26. Go right into my PhD program. Have my PhD completed by 30-31. By 31 I am a practicing/registered clinical psychologist. Somewhere between there I have met my life partner, am married, and/or am about to get married, and will start having children ASAP. I will have also saved up enough to have bought a nice car and house, will be financially stable, healthy, etc. By setting up these strict age limits on my life progress, I set myself up for disappointment if something doesn't come through on that timeline. This timeline was a source of frequent pressure and worry that I will not achieve (my operational definition of) success. A significant source of anxiety that I will become a failure.
After some weeks of counselling and taking the time to think things through, I have recently decided to let this timeline go. While still 100% motivated to reach the aforementioned goals at some point in my life, I have dropped the "age of completion" limits to which they were attached. The most tangible evidence of this change of thinking is that I am not applying to PhD programmes next year. I am taking a year off and hoping to move to Quebec City to teach ESL in the public school system. I am looking forward to living on my own, and to the change of scenery from (the beautiful but predictable) Newfoundland. By allowing myself to see the grey areas of life, I have (hopefully) opened myself to new opportunities.
Susan
The most important thing I've learned over the past few months has been how my way of thinking has affected my perception of things around me, and my overall happiness/satisfaction. Specifically, the rigidity of my thoughts has greatly influenced my personal satisfaction with where my life is, and where it is going.
As my personality is somewhat rigid and tense, I have the tendency to think in black and white. I am either fully pleased or fully unhappy in the sense that it is easy for me to let a small unhappiness seep it's way into positive occurrences and dull their happy effects. Rigid thinking has also set me up for failure and disappointment, which has not contributed any happy feelings to my life. At the age of 24, I can say that I am not where I thought I would be by now, and I used to feel terrible about it. But I am not going to let myself feel bad about it anymore.
The most recent example of this type of thinking negatively impacting my happiness is the "life plan" I had drawn up for myself. Masters degree completed by age 26. Go right into my PhD program. Have my PhD completed by 30-31. By 31 I am a practicing/registered clinical psychologist. Somewhere between there I have met my life partner, am married, and/or am about to get married, and will start having children ASAP. I will have also saved up enough to have bought a nice car and house, will be financially stable, healthy, etc. By setting up these strict age limits on my life progress, I set myself up for disappointment if something doesn't come through on that timeline. This timeline was a source of frequent pressure and worry that I will not achieve (my operational definition of) success. A significant source of anxiety that I will become a failure.
After some weeks of counselling and taking the time to think things through, I have recently decided to let this timeline go. While still 100% motivated to reach the aforementioned goals at some point in my life, I have dropped the "age of completion" limits to which they were attached. The most tangible evidence of this change of thinking is that I am not applying to PhD programmes next year. I am taking a year off and hoping to move to Quebec City to teach ESL in the public school system. I am looking forward to living on my own, and to the change of scenery from (the beautiful but predictable) Newfoundland. By allowing myself to see the grey areas of life, I have (hopefully) opened myself to new opportunities.
Susan
Wednesday, 12 March 2014
My Resolutions
Although I doubt anyone is reading this, I feel the need to apologize for a) not posting for a couple of weeks and b) not starting my resolutions at the start of March which is what I had intended. Although I am trying to avoid the "I'm too busy" excuse, the past couple of weeks have been pretty nuts and so this personal project was pushed to the back burner.
My next step is to finalize my resolutions for the next 12 months. I am still going to start the project this month (partly because it's still the beginning(ish) of March, and partly because I don't want to put this off anymore). Moving onto the goals, this is what I have come up with so far. Each month has a little "theme" per say, and then subsequent goals will be determined as the months ago along. Each theme is an area of my life (or myself) that I feel needs more attention or improvement.
My Resolutions
Although I could talk about anxiety related stuff forever (this is also my area of research for my masters degree) I will break down this general goal into 3 smaller goals that I will try to complete over the next few weeks.
1) Take at least 15 minutes each day for quiet time/time for reflection. 15 minutes may sound like too little or too long of an amount of time for this to be effective, but in the daily grind of emailing, texting, twitter, online courses, and every other form of communication, I feel that a few minutes each day away from these distractions will give me time to check in with myself about how stressed or anxious I'm feeling.
2) Allow myself to recognize how I'm feeling. This is something that I don't normally do, and I'm betting I'm not the only one. Something "adverse" happens in my life, and instead of looking to myself to recognize how I'm feeling (and how I can properly address these emotions), I am far more likely to busy myself with other tasks to ignore any upsetting emotions. I predict that by allowing myself to both feel and deal with such feelings, I will be better able to keep any anxiety at bay, or minimize it.
3) Deep breathes. Deep breathing is a relaxation technique that I have heard about for years, and that was recommended to me a few months ago. I always thought it sounded stupid and/or was too easy of a technique to really work. I used to do in the car on the way to certain social events, and found it somewhat helpful, but I didn't give it a real shot and therefore am including it in my goals. For anyone else who is interested in this technique, I have been told by health professionals that deep breathes from your stomach (not shallow ones from your chest) are the most helpful. You can do them everyday, or before certain events that you predict will provoke an anxiety attack.
How does any of this relate to my happiness? I'm predicting that less anxiety = more happiness (or feelings of happiness).
I'm going to track these goals in a resolution chart as laid out on The Happiness Project website.
Well I feel that I have rambled on enough for one day ... let's see how successful I'll be with this months resolutions.
Susan
My next step is to finalize my resolutions for the next 12 months. I am still going to start the project this month (partly because it's still the beginning(ish) of March, and partly because I don't want to put this off anymore). Moving onto the goals, this is what I have come up with so far. Each month has a little "theme" per say, and then subsequent goals will be determined as the months ago along. Each theme is an area of my life (or myself) that I feel needs more attention or improvement.
My Resolutions
- March - Take time to breathe
- April - Taking risks
- May - Mindfulness
- June - Show affection
- July - Being alone (but not lonely)
- August - Being thankful
- September - Organization
- October - Reduce tension
- November - Be a better friend
- December - Do (and find) what you enjoy
- January - Staying on track
- February - Temper
These themes/goals for each month are still in their "draft" phase and may shift as the project continues. Maybe I'll pick up on another aspect of my life that needs to be addressed, or maybe one of the aforementioned goals won't be in need of my focus as time passes. But I digress, and for now, I'll focus on the goal/theme for March 2014: Take time to breathe.
I have made this my first goal for a few reasons, but the main reason is that I have recently spent a lot of time and energy working on my problems with anxiety and want to continue my focus on this area of personal growth.
I have been highly anxious for as long as I can remember (although I didn't always know to recognize these feeling as anxiety, or being based in my anxiety). I am known in my friend group as the "anxious" or "tense" one, which I'm 100% fine with because this 100% true.
In grades five and six, I had to eat Tums stomach tablets before school every morning due to nausea and a constant feeling of uneasiness. In high school, I mistook anxiety for depression and felt alone a lot of the time. My social anxiety came to a head last year, and I found myself unable to sleep at night and desperately avoiding certain social situations. I hated meeting new people. I hated starting conversations. I felt terrible about myself and had a hard time trusting people.
I am in no way saying that my experiences with anxiety are specific to me, and I recognize that many people go through these feelings. Many of us feel anxiety at certain points in our lives, and to different extents of severity. Anxiety can depend on a multitude of factors and can come and go during one's lifetime. While I have never been officially diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder or Social Anxiety Disorder, I felt these types of anxiety at their most concentrated points during the year 2013, and it was starting to affect my daily life to the point that it felt disabling.
In grades five and six, I had to eat Tums stomach tablets before school every morning due to nausea and a constant feeling of uneasiness. In high school, I mistook anxiety for depression and felt alone a lot of the time. My social anxiety came to a head last year, and I found myself unable to sleep at night and desperately avoiding certain social situations. I hated meeting new people. I hated starting conversations. I felt terrible about myself and had a hard time trusting people.
I am in no way saying that my experiences with anxiety are specific to me, and I recognize that many people go through these feelings. Many of us feel anxiety at certain points in our lives, and to different extents of severity. Anxiety can depend on a multitude of factors and can come and go during one's lifetime. While I have never been officially diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder or Social Anxiety Disorder, I felt these types of anxiety at their most concentrated points during the year 2013, and it was starting to affect my daily life to the point that it felt disabling.
Feeling fed up with my anxiety and the negative impact it was having on my life, I addressed the problem with counselling which has been very helpful. I was able to recognize parts of my life that were causing my stress, and learn new skills to address them. I have been working on my attitude and personal resiliency, which has also helped. While I have been feeling significantly better, I want to continue on this path with this theme of "taking time to breathe".
Although I could talk about anxiety related stuff forever (this is also my area of research for my masters degree) I will break down this general goal into 3 smaller goals that I will try to complete over the next few weeks.
1) Take at least 15 minutes each day for quiet time/time for reflection. 15 minutes may sound like too little or too long of an amount of time for this to be effective, but in the daily grind of emailing, texting, twitter, online courses, and every other form of communication, I feel that a few minutes each day away from these distractions will give me time to check in with myself about how stressed or anxious I'm feeling.
2) Allow myself to recognize how I'm feeling. This is something that I don't normally do, and I'm betting I'm not the only one. Something "adverse" happens in my life, and instead of looking to myself to recognize how I'm feeling (and how I can properly address these emotions), I am far more likely to busy myself with other tasks to ignore any upsetting emotions. I predict that by allowing myself to both feel and deal with such feelings, I will be better able to keep any anxiety at bay, or minimize it.
3) Deep breathes. Deep breathing is a relaxation technique that I have heard about for years, and that was recommended to me a few months ago. I always thought it sounded stupid and/or was too easy of a technique to really work. I used to do in the car on the way to certain social events, and found it somewhat helpful, but I didn't give it a real shot and therefore am including it in my goals. For anyone else who is interested in this technique, I have been told by health professionals that deep breathes from your stomach (not shallow ones from your chest) are the most helpful. You can do them everyday, or before certain events that you predict will provoke an anxiety attack.
How does any of this relate to my happiness? I'm predicting that less anxiety = more happiness (or feelings of happiness).
I'm going to track these goals in a resolution chart as laid out on The Happiness Project website.
Well I feel that I have rambled on enough for one day ... let's see how successful I'll be with this months resolutions.
Susan
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