Showing Affection

Showing affection can sometimes be a very difficult thing for me and I'm not sure why. My parents have always been affectionate, my family is generally open and loving, and the majority of my friends appear to be quite comfortable with this concept. When I think about it, it's kind of strange that I, a person who has been in multiple long term relationships and holds a fairly solid group of friends/family, have a hard time feeling comfortable with showing affection. I generally associate affection-showing with awkwardness, or too much contact with people (Weird? Maybe I have a guard up? Anyways).

The only reason I can come up with for this discomfort with the expression of affection is the vulnerability that I perceive to be attached to this concept. But does showing affection actually make someone vulnerable? Maybe yes, in the sense that they are openly expressing their emotions, but maybe no. Maybe the ability to express affection demonstrates a certain confidence in feeling comfortable with both yourself and your emotions? Comfortable enough to express them without fear of judgement from your peers? Anyways I digress ...

How might affection be related to my happiness? I'm not 100% sure, but I'm predicting that an increased comfort level in showing affection will positively enhance the relationships around me, which may in turn enhance my (perceived) levels of happiness? (Now I sound like I'm writing another thesis ... ugh). I am definitely turning into that annoying psychology student friend who tries to turn everything into a psychological discussion.  But moving on (goal breakdown as I am writing this on my lunch break and don't have much time left).

3 ways to hopefully improve my comfort levels with showing affection: 

1) Hug at least one person a day (without crossing boundaries and/or being creepy, obviously)
2) If I'm feeling positive/happy while hanging out with someone, I will (try to) tell them
3) Try to commit 1 act of gratitude for someone in my life at least 3 times a week

I KNOW I KNOW there are only 2 weeks left to June. But I've been busy. Working 1 full time job, 1 part time job, being in school full time, collecting data, volunteering, and trying to still have a social life has taken over my summer. I'm trying y'all (even though no one is reading this anyways so it doesn't matter...).

Susan